“I can’t be with someone who is as selfish as you.”
Never get unsettled when a woman calls you selfish. It is one of the greatest compliments you can receive, as it means you are aware of your own worth. Be a selfish man. Be greedy. Always empower yourself first. Don’t let a feminist like that Idiot nerdlove try to shame you into doing something against your self-interest by calling you selfish, they want you to be ashamed of it. Would women be bitching about the death of chivalry if they didn’t believe they hold a monopoly on being selfish?
Why is a simple word like selfish important for your dating life? So that you act in the interests of women’s dating laziness! According to Fletcher and Kerr (2010) “…a ‘leap of faith’ is necessary in sustaining long term relationships which is powered by strong emotional attachment”. Since women will not, under any circumstances, be the ones to take the “leap of faith” (being the first to risk emotional humiliation by being rejected) men must be conditioned to be the ones to “take the leap”. You can see why it is so important that assholes maintain an absolute control over the word selfish. It’s all about relationship power. If a man were to decide that he will pick only from a pool of women who show clear interest in him, or even worse EXPECT a woman to show clear interest before he will “take the leap” women might have to stop being lazy! Maybe even grow up a little bit emotionally!
A study of 6,000 college students found that “…manipulation is a common tactic used amongst college students in coercing romantic partners into sexual activity.” (Struckman-Johnson, et al, 2003.) The self-assessment indicated that men employ this method at twice the rate women do, but the authors speculate the self-assessment seriously understates the female rate.
This establishes that manipulation is a fundamental part of relationships (no surprises). Look at this quote about how language forms our understanding of ideas: “The human conceptual system, in addition to being the endpoint of language comprehension and the starting point of language production, also has to serve non-linguistic purposes. It has to encode our non-linguistic understanding of the world, making it possible for us to perceive the world, draw inferences from what we perceive, and formulate actions.” (Jackendoff, 2012). So language comprehension and our perception of the world are fundamentally related to each other in the human conceptual system.
Starting to see why the different meanings of a word like selfish is so important?
When a woman calls me selfish I have to stop myself from laughing. The way female selfishness is described in this day and age is so ridiculous. Words like empowered, liberated, strong, and independent. Meanwhile, how is a man described when he is acting selfishly? He is an asshole, jerk, entitled, and the king of snarky nerdshit insults; douchebag. This not-so-subtle difference serves a societal purpose of shaming men who don’t act in the interests of everyone except themselves, but that isn’t the point of this article. But in the romantic realm, the negative language association of selfish and men suits the laziness of women. After all, if a man needs to address her needs first, she can focus on herself! Empowerment! As an added bonus, it gives a lot of interpersonal power women covet in their romantic lives. All I hear when a woman calls me selfish is: “Stop being self-interested, do things for me, pay attention to me!”
Being aware of when this type of language is being used against you will allow you to hear who is interested in you as a human, selfish being, and who is interested in you as an object for their benefit. Embrace the first, shun the second. There is a lot more to the language women (and shitheads like Dr.Moron) use to shame men (creepy anyone?) but taking a deeper look at the word selfish fits this blog like a glove.
In the meantime channel your inner Gordon Gecko. Be selfish, laugh in the face of any woman who wants you to do all the work, and walk away when a woman stops contributing to your life.
Fletcher, G. J. O., & Kerr, P. S. G. (2010). Through of eyes of love: Reality and
illusion in intimate relationships. Psychological Bulletin, 136(4), 627-658.
Jackendoff, Ray. (2012). What is the human language faculty? Two Views. Tufts University.
Struckman-Johnson, C., Struckman-Johnson, D., & Anderson, P. B. (2003).
Tactics of sexual coercion: When men and women won’t take no for an answer. The Journal of Sex Research, 40(1), 76-86.